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Nov 14

90 Day Rule

So what’s with this 90 day rule?  Lord people read something in a book and just run with it!   Guess what?  There is no magic timeline for when you should have sex!  Unless your personal spiritual beliefs state that you have to wait until marriage or something, when and if you choose to have sex with someone is a personal decision. 

This Vixen thinks a woman should wait until her MIND and BODY are ready to be intimate with a man. The body is the easy part, the mind on the other hand is a little more complicated. Its personal to each woman and the amount of time it takes will vary for each relationship.

Her top concerns should be MORAL AGREEMENT, SAFETY, TRUST, LIKELIHOOD OF PLEASURE.

MORAL AGREEMENT:
  • Does you personal spiritual and/or moral beliefs align with have sex with this person?
  • Is he married/in a committed relationship?
  • Do you care?
  • Do you believe sex outside of marriage is ok?
  • Are you committed to following your stated religious beliefs?
  • Do you think women who have sex after just meeting a man are sluts/whores?
  • Do you want to think of yourself that way?
 
SAFETY:
  • Do you REALLY feel 100% comfortable being alone with this person?
  • Are you sure he is disease free?
  • Do you care?
TRUST:
  • If “something” happens such a an unplanned pregnancy do you trust this person will live up to his accountability be it assisting you in raising & caring for the child and/or supporting you through a termination?
  • Do you trust that he will keep your sexual activities in confidence?
  • Are you free to be 100% self-expressed with him in the bedroom w/o fear of judgement?
LIKELIHOOD OF PLEASURE:
  • Has he demonstrated that he has or is willing to learn the skills to please you?
  • For example If you like caressing/touching, does he hold your hand, rub your shoulders, rub your feet, stroke you hand, etc…?
  • Does he have any flexibility in his pelvic region? (A great way to find out is to go dancing. I mean who wants a man who can only pump in and out, the hip swerve is crucial!)
  • Is he considerate of your feelings?
  • Does he really seem to care about making you happy or is it all about him?
Having sex before you know these key things is a crap shoot and/or a recipe for guilt and regret. It may take 2 hours or it may take 2 months, but having sex with a loser, catching something, feeling guilty about sex, and/or having “bad sex” sucks! 
That’s  my official stance on the 90 Day rule!  Please keep in mind that leading up to the “big event” there are stages so while determining the answers to this questions other intimate activities could take place (if within the parameters of your personal beliefs).  So I am all for kissing, cuddling, caressing, fondling, etc…

Read More at VirtuousVixen.com

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